Poetry in Motion Sickness

Poetry in Motion Sickness- Follow me in the pursuit of my dream. Its not pretty, its not glamorous, its not fair, its Hollywood. Read about my crazy journey and laugh with me about the speed bumps along the way. I hope driving doesn't make you nauseous!!!!

Saturday, February 27, 2010

Back to Blogness

I know, I know, its been a while. Quite frankly, I haven't had much to write about til now. Its basically been the same old chase. Random commercial auditions here and there. Nothing to blog home about. Oh, I did have one funny audition where we were taken into a room two at a time, told to make a plate for ourselves out of three different types of bread. 1) a hamburger bun, meant to represent a sandwich 2) cubes of bread, meant to represent a salad 3) a tortilla filled with bread, meant to represent a taco... We were then instructed to eat said items one at a time, pretending to enjoy each bite. The casting director actually used the word "luxuriate!" Long story short, the guy I was auditioning with ate the bread taco with so much vigor, that he ended up choking and almost vomited!!!!!! I know its mean but I almost lost my shit. That was what I like to call an over-audition!!!!!

Things had dried up a little in the commercial world lately so I decided to restart my crusade for a theatrical agent. I've been sending out headshots and resumes to absolutely every agent with an address, possibly even a few real estate agents... I finally got a response the other day and scheduled an appointment for Thursday to meet with one of these much revered agent-type beings. I showed up armed with headshot, resume, reel, and monologue. Yes that's right, I said monologue. The monologue is something every actor dreads. The concept of a person speaking for such an extended period of time with absolutely no interruptions is a little far fetched as it is, not to mention the difficulty one has finding well written material that isn't overused or overly emotional. There are tons of monologues that require the detailed retelling of a molestation, contraction of an STD, a beating by a boyfriend, or the likes. Not such a good idea to get too issuey, you never know what repressed memories you could be dragging up for your audience... Anyway, I actually struck gold with a good one a little while back, and felt confident that it was appropriate without being dull. A good fit for me, ya know. I went in, performed my monologue and actually nailed it. I couldn't believe it!! The agent loved me and basically told me right there and then that she wanted to sign me and told me to expect a call the following day. I left on cloud nine!

On my way back to SD, a couple of hours later, I received an audition notice via the usual text and email. I have to say, I'm happy to get the opportunities but these ones are always hard to take. It was an audition for an amusement park that, if I booked it, would only make me around $1000. I know that sounds nice, but if I don't book it, I've lost $40 in gas and an entire days work. This particular audition was for the following day. I would have to get back in my car and drive another 2 1/2 hrs there and 2 1/2 hrs back. Ugh! I complain, but I gotta do what I gotta do, so, I got in the car the following day (this was yesterday). I was on my way up when all of a sudden the traffic came to a grinding halt. I was sitting there in front of the Dolly Parton Monument going zero miles an hour for about 30mins! WTF! I knew it was Friday, but this was ridiculous! Turns out, there was a freakin grenade on the south bound 5!!!!! Traffic in both directions was being diverted. I called my agent to let her know that there was no way I was going to make it in time, hoping she would tell me not to worry about it and go on home. She did not tell me what I wanted to hear. Instead, she told me to call her in an hour and let her know where I was. Um no. The rate I was going, I would end up arriving in LA just in time for rush hour. This means I would have been stuck in traffic coming home. Let me put this simply, I left SD at about 12pm, by 2:30pm I hadn't even reached San Clemente at that speed I would probably reach LA at about 5pm. I would be back on the road again by about 5:30 which means I would be lucky to get home by 8pm. This is at least 8hrs of driving for one 5min audition that may or may not make me $1000 before agent fee and taxes. SO NOT WORTH IT. I turned around and went home. What a wasted day. Although, as always, it made for a good story... Oh and on a good note, that agent did call me the next day! Yay! Have to call her back on Monday. I'll keep you posted!

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